Tasteless Renegade
by Wario the TableMan
Summary: WAH! Hey It's-a me Wario! This is the epic tale of a hedgehog versus everyone's worse nightmare! Who will win this glorious bttle? Check out to find out! Also 1,111 word count so respect Bokkun!


Shadow tightened his grip on his righteous pistol. He was fighting the biggest, baddest badman there ever was. Yup, it was the green wonder himself and he was deadly. So deadly, folks would say he rivaled the powers of any force in the universe. His name was Cilan Robotnik and he had turned to the dark side and this spelled doom for everybody.

Shadow cried out for Cilan to get back to his old self, but it was no use as demonstrated by how Cilan quickly dispatched of everyone else in the vicinity almost effortlessly.

"Cilan, my boy!" said Shadow. "Come back to your senses! You gotta stop doing all this evil stuff!"

"Silence, fool!" said Cilan. "I have restored this world into its innocent state. I can now meld it into whichever ways I see fit as the perfect utopia."

"Your being very bad and need to sit in the corner and think about all the bad things you've done!"

"Don't lecture me, Shadow. I see through the lies of the Hedgehogs. I do not fear the deliciousness as you do. I have brought peace, justice, freedom, and security to my new Empire.

"YOUR new empire?"

"Don't make me kill you."

"Cilan, my allegiance is to the republic. To democracy!"

"If you're not with me, you're my enemy."

"Only a Freak deals in absolutes… I will do what I must."

"You will try."

Suddenly Cilan leaps up at amazing heights and blasts Shadow with his two giant machine guns. Shadow uses Chaos control to dodge all the blasts and smacks Cilan with the back of his rifle. He kicks the green dude away and slams his gun into the ground. He pulls the trigger and blasts up high into the sky to incept the guy he punted. Shadow pulls out two smaller guns from underneath each of his eyelids and starts blasting Cilan like Swiss cheese. Cilan disappears, evading all of Shadow's bullets as if he were nothing but an illusion. Then Cilan appears on top of Shadow and starts beating him with his amazing fists that have caught on fire thanks to his hotcakey mu-wah. Shadow is badly damaged by the onslaught, but quickly regains his composure before hitting the ground and launcher a spring out of his booty to send both of them flying high once again.

Cilan grabs his plasma cannon out of his back pocket and Shadow pulls out a bazooka. They both pull the triggers simultaneously and the impact from the collision of the two opposing blasts sends them plummeting backwards away from one another.

Shadow lands in a mountain and struggles to break free since the impact lodged him pretty deep into the rock. Cilan has landed on the ground a ways off and notices that Shadow has yet to move. Cilan is completely convinced that this is his golden opportunity. He jumps back and then leaps forward with amazing force from his legs. He instantly lands right on top of Shadow and buries him even deeper into the mountainside. The mountain crumbles under the pressure of Cilan's extra-spicy moves and he flies into the sky and holds up his hands. Cilan focuses as he draws in the energy from his surrounding into a giant nova blast and launches the projectile at Shadow to end it all.

The impact from the nova blast shatters the area into tiny fragments of nothingness and the explosion is so large, the entire planet starts to crack into two pieces. Cilan is standing above it all, watching every eruption form as the nova blast buries itself deeper and deeper into the crust and burrowing through the mantle. The blast releases one more rampant explosion before dispelling into the atmosphere and decimating what little substance remained of the battle site.

The dust settles after a few minutes and Cilan stares down at his handiwork panting. He never thought he would have to use his nova blast on anyone until now. Shadow had proven to be quite the formidable opponent, but still, Cilan felt he was let off too easily. Cilan turned around and noticed that there was a faint glow of yellowish light being given off to the east.

The rubble below Cilan started to shift and stones starter to rise as if by the force of another. It was the force of another. It was Shadow. He had the seven Chaos Emeralds with him the whole time and now he had used their unlimited power to become Super Shadow: Champion of the Galaxies. Cilan was frustrated and started launching more and more powerful projectiles at Shadow. But Shadow was not having this anymore. He knew this green freako had to be defeated and pay for his unjust actions. Shadow quickly prepared a Chaos blast and started pelting Cilan with as much Chaos as possible. Cilan was able to bat away a few of Shadow's attacks, but when he missed one time, he continued missing, and eventually was overwhelmed by the power of Chaos to the point where there was no time to rethink his defensive strategy.

Cilan was utterly blown away and landed on the ground below. Shadow bolted down and delivered a harsh beating to Cilan right before he pulled out two big rocket launchers that shot WAH-bombs and totally obliterated the green menace. He then picked up the badly-damaged foe and smacked some sense into him using his head.

"Cilan, you've been very bad and I'm gonna kick your booty, young man."

"I'm not ready to give up." Cilan then grabbed Shadow by the neck and lifted him high above his head. "I will not die so easily when a new world order is just within my grasp." He then kicked Shadow with a rocking Tatsumaki and then flew toward him while shooting green fireballs like a madman. He intercepted Cilan right before he crashed and then slammed his face into the ground. Cilan then hoisted Shadow high above his head and performed that back-breaker move that Bane did to Batman in that one movie that Arin Hanson says is a "comedy". Cilan then kicked him up to the heavens and then slammed him down with a soaring axe kick to the noggin. The impact of Shadow's landing caused a huge explosion that caused fire to rain down for a while.

Cilan flew down and told Shadow it was over. Shadow lost the power of the Chaos Emeralds and Cilan ate all seven of them. Shadow could not regain consciousness and instead remained motionless on the floor at Cilan's feet. Cilan laughed evilly and then turned away. "Today is the day I begin restoration…"

The End...?


End file.
